small + friendly

Self-Help Mode

I've been on a major self-help kick lately.  I blame my podcast addiction.  I'm one of those grown-ups who misses school and podcasts have helped fill that longing for sitting in a lecture hall.  It all started when a friend recommended Magic Lessons.  I've got to be honest, Elizabeth Gilbert kinda bugs me sometimes, but I enjoyed her message (Episodes 1 and 12 had me in tears) and it got me hooked on podcasts. Since then my subscribe list has become quite ecclectic, but there is one podcast that has really changed the way I see things: Happier with Gretchen Rubin.  I'll admit the first episode I listened to I thought, "These ladies are a bit strange and they seem to be trying to impersonate the guys from Car Talk."  But then I listened to an episode about the Four Tendencies that blew my mind (I'm an Upholder married to a Rebel in case you're wondering).  I have since listened to every single episode and I've grown to love Gretchen and her sister Elizabeth.  They make striving for a better, happier life sound doable.  And if nothing else they have helped me learn how to play to my strengths instead of battling my weaknesses.  

My love of the Happier podcast, of course, lead me to buy Better Than Before* (I got it from the library first, but then decided it was too good not to own) and it has my head swirling with hopes for better habits.  What I like most about Grethen's approach is the emphasis on getting to know yourself better.  For example, one thing I've realized is that I do best if I keep my goals private.  I can't tell you how many times I've declared I will do something and simply declaring it somehow takes the wind out of my sails.  So, while I am working to radically change many of my habits, I'm not going to make any huge declarations right now.  I do however intend to check back in when I see what sticks and share what I've learned.  I've got my new Get To Work Book and nice set of pens and I'm ready to dive in.  I feel both excited and trepidatious.  I want to make changes as long as they feel positive and energizing.  As soon as I start dreading my new habits I know it will be time to reexamine.  I need to remind myself that I can do anything, but not everything.    

Now I can't finish this post about resolutions without sharing one that I read by my friend Anne of Flax & Twine.  It already has me thinking twice about a few of my goals.  If you've ever struggled with asking too much of yourself, I encourage you to read her beautiful words.   

How about you?  Have you ever dug into the self-help world, any books I should check out?  Am I the only one that does better with secret goals?  And perhaps most importantly, what are your favorite podcasts?

* Affiliate link, if you click these links and make any purchase on Amazon, I get a tiny commission, thank you so much for your support!

Birth Intentions + a Few Book Recommendations

So I know that trying to plan your birth can be a difficult task.  A birth plan insinuates that you have control over how your labor unfolds, which is just not possible.  However, while we can't control how our body will behave during birth, we can control how we, as birthing mothers, are treated; and we have every right to have preferences for our care.  This can be a difficult thing to take ownership of.  I know I'm afraid that stating my intentions might be jinxing it or setting myself up for disappointment.  There is also the worry over the perception that if your birth plan isn't purely "whatever it takes to have a healthy baby" that your baby's health isn't your priority.  This article puts it very eloquently.  

Now before I share my own birth intentions, I would like to say that I think that any and all birth choices are valid and totally personal.  My birth preferences are mostly informed by my own prior experience, which was quite wonderful, but ultimately not totally ideal.  What I am getting at is that while Jude's birth was in no way a "chain of negative interventions", I was left with a list of things I'd like to do differently next time.  Namely, I was left with a horrible headache from the epidural, and I also ended up with an episiotomy that became an epic tear - both made recovery more difficult than I'd expected.

I am at once nervous and excited, here are my hopes for a Drug-free (natural is WAY too loaded a term for me) Hospital Birth:

- I would like to labor as long as possible at home.

- I would like to avoid pain medication and not have it offered to me.

- I would prefer to skip (if not medically necessary): IV fluids, pitocin, episiotomy, vacuum extraction, and it goes without saying, a c-section.  

That's pretty much it.  I want to trust more than just my doctor and nurses, I also want to trust my body.  My hope is that I look back on this birth as an empowering experience.  And I can promise you one thing, when I feel like pushing, that is what I'll be doing even it means Jason has to play catcher!  

So with the drug-free goal in mind, I have been doing a lot of research.  My friend Lacy of Living on Love wrote a wonderful post that I found very helpful, and I have turned to the following three books for guidance.

Birthing from Within*

What I loved:  I love how positive this book is, and I think it gives a lot of great techniques for coping with pain.  I also thought the section for the birth partners/fathers was excellent and very helpful.  Reading this book made me feel confident and excited about attempting a drug-free birth.

What I skipped:  The really crunchy art exploration wasn't for me; although, I think if I had suffered a traumatic first birth, it could have been very helpful.  You've got to have an open mind, especially when it comes to the visuals in this one.   

HypnoBirthing*

What I loved:  I love the focus on letting go of fear and working with your body.  I find the cd very relaxing, think guided meditation with a birthing focus.  I also like that you are encouraged to think positively about your upcoming birth and avoid horror stories that don't help that positive frame of mind.  The focus on trying to remain relaxed is appealing to me.

What I skipped:  I didn't like the implication that if birth hurts, you are doing it wrong.  I also refuse to believe that this is the only method you need for coping with that "imaginary" pain.  Lastly, there seem to be some pretty silly and overly broad claims that run counter to the whole "relaxation" message, so I simply chose to ignore those and work on adding guided meditation/self-hypnosis as a tool in my pain coping tool box.  

Unbound Birth*

What I loved:  The relaxed positive non-preachy vibe of this book is wonderful.  The birth stories made me feel excited and confident about my own birth.  Also, this book specifically focuses on achieving the birth you want in a hospital setting.

What I skipped:  I won't be hiring a doula, even though this book makes a great case for having one.  Not only can we not really afford one, I already know that I am a "less people the better" kind of gal.

Is there a book I absolutely must read?  Please share, I've still got three weeks and a little extra help never hurt!

* These are affiliate links, if you make a purchase after clicking this link, I make a tiny commission, thanks!  Also, I was given a copy of Unbound Birth, but as always all opinions are my own.

Let's Talk Modern Homemaking

I was recently gifted this amazing box of quilt pieces.  They belonged to my great-great grandmother.  They are all hand sewn, and the fabric came almost exclusively from feed bags and flour sacks.  I love them.  And I obviously must learn to quilt.  I can't wait to give these beautiful pieces a meaningful life.  Plus, I've never met a craft I didn't like, so I'm pretty sure quilting was inevitable.  When I sort through these squares, I am all at once sad that this art form was not handed down from generation to generation (and deeply saddened that my chicken feed doesn't come in beautiful cotton fabric) and also thankful that because quilting in my family is a lost art, I get to be the one to revive it.  

I love learning a new, useful skill.  I love the idea that someday there will be a quilt in my home that is a magical collaboration between two homemakers separated by generations.  My great grandmother was a practitioner of "Old Domesticity"; she grew a garden and raised chickens because her family needed to eat.  She sewed quilts and clothing from feed bags because her family had to keep warm.  

Joining the workforce and paying for these things instead wasn't an option for her.  Since we never met, I can't ask her whether she enjoyed her role as a homemaker.  Looking at the love put into those perfect little stitches, I can't help but think it wasn't a total drag, but I could just as likely be romanticizing it.  You see, I have a choice.  If I don't get around to making this quilt I can just pick up a comforter at Target with money I've earned at my job.  I am mostly grateful but sometimes overwhelmed by this choice, and the many other choices our generation is faced with.  

I've Been Published! (Plus Giveaway)

Note: This post contains affiliate links, when you make a purchase after clicking you help support small + friendly, thanks!

Alright so it's a far cry from my own book deal, but I do have a project in a really cool craft book!  Never Been Stitched is book with 45 No-Sew and Low-Sew Projects by some very talented designers (I had to pinch myself when I found my name next to the amazing Dana of MADE).  What I love about the projects in this book is how accessible they are, you don't need any fancy equipment or advanced skills.  From beautiful home decor to cute kid toys to adorable grown up clothing, this book has got something for every one.  And I've got a copy to give away!

Enter the rafflecopter below for your chance to win.  

a Rafflecopter giveaway

 Can't wait to get your hands on a copy?  Find it here: Never Been Stitched: 45 No-Sew & Low-Sew Projects

Handmade Winter - a winner and a preview!

Congrats to Cory of Lady Cordelia, she won a free copy of Handmade Winter.  

I know you're jealous, but don't fret you can still get your own copy for less than a pizza and you don't have to wait 45 minutes for it to be delivered.  

Need an awesome gift for a crafty friend, this would be perfect!  

Or maybe you could use a few last minute handmade gift ideas, this book is full of them!  My leather and chain jewerly tutorial takes less that half an hour and results in a piece that looks like you spent big bucks on etsy.

The best part?  This book is full of inspriration for a whole season of making and sharing.  There is plenty more winter to enjoy after the holidays and this book will inspire all kinds of making and entertaining right through until spring has sprung.  

Click here to purchase your copy today!

 

Celebrate Winter the Handmade Way - A new ebook and giveaway!

I am thrilled to announce the sale of a beautiful new ebook:  Handmade Winter

Just in time for all of your winter crafting and celebrating!  This book is packed with over 50 craft tutorials, recipes, and beautiful thoughts for a wonderful winter.  As a collaboration put together by the amazing #creativemamas team, it's like having all your favorite blogs in one place.  Gifts to create, meals to share, reasons to cozy in and celebrate - not just the holidays - but all winter long.  

I've got a pretty cool jewelry tutorial in there.  And if you ask me, the cocktail recipes alone make this book a great value.  (Pst - it's only 15 bucks!)

What are you waiting for?  Get your copy today!  And don't forget all of the creative mamas on your list!  

Want a chance to win a copy?  Share this post on facebook, pinterest, or twitter and leave me a comment here letting me know that you did!  Giveaway will be open until December 10th 2013 12pm PST.    

Currently Reading

Have you heard of Homeward Bound: Why Women Are Embracing the New Domesticity?  I was actually interviewed for it, you can find a few of my heartfelt, if less than eloquent, quotes in the first chapter.  The author Emily Matchar, was great to chat with, she was very nice and funny and I totally talked her ear off.  

Obviously, the subject of new domesticity (AKA modern homemaking) is near and dear to my heart.  I am only halfway through the book and I've already got lots to say, it is certainly full of food for thought.  Anyway, before I give you my two cents I thought I'd give you a chance to read it yourself, if you are so inclined.  Interested in a little book discussion?  Pick up your copy and meet me back here in about a month.     

P.S. - In the meantime, this post has some beautiful thoughts on the subject.

5 Awesome Audio Books for Preschoolers

I'm pretty sure Jude could happily be read to all day long.  He loves to climb into my lap with a big stack of books.  And I love it too.  Reading stories is one of our favorite pastimes.  Unfortunately, I can't read to him all day long.  That's were audio books come in.  Jude loves his ever growing collection of read aloud books and so do I.  They buy this mama a nice little chunk of quiet time, and I've found they make errand running much more pleasant as well.  Plus, they carry a pretty hefty dose of nostaligia, even if CD's aren't as cool as little orange records.     

1.  Frog and Toad Are Friends  -   A classic read by the author.  This one has the fun little chimes when it's time to turn the page.  I love these stories, and they really come to life when read aloud.  

2.  Corduroy  -  A sweet story with lots of extras.  I've always loved the story of Corduroy and so does Jude.  His favorites are the bonus bear facts and songs that follow the reading.  I find the singing a little comical (lots of vibrato), but Jude digs it so I'm down.

3.  Pickles to Pittsburgh -  This is the sequel to one of our favorites, Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs.  It's a great story about helping others, and it is very well read.

4.  Skippyjon Jones, Lost in Spice - Skippy Jon is another favorite around here, all the more because the hardcover books all come with a CD of the author reading the story.  Of all the books in the series, Lost In Spice is a particularly good one.   

5.  Micawber -  What could be better than reading this lovely story?  Why, listening to the author, John Lithgow, read it of course!  This was another score, the CD comes with the book, and Jude has loved it from a very early age.  

Not sure if your little one will be into listening to a CD instead of you?  I have found our local library to be an awesome resource for audio books for kids, so try a few out.  You might just find the perfect way to grab a few moments of peace, all while strengthening your little one's reading muscles.  

Here's to educational quiet.

P.S. - After failing to find a "kid" CD player that seemed worth the money, we just dug out an old walkman, and Jude has been able to work it just fine.  Please use caution when mixing kids and cords.

P.P.S. - Here are the tutorials for the reading fort and mini lounger.     

Note: This post contains affiliate links, I earn a tiny commission from purchases made through the links above.